Wacho!!!

Ok this was going to be a way for me to get out my feelings of anxiety but i have to bring this up. I work in customer seriice and i get some of the strangest people in the world. 

my most resent wacho is one that is politcal. She was a very nice lady and was easy to talk to and I was able to help her quickly and once we finished what we were doing she started a normal conversation with me which I myself was enjoying untill i was starting my close statement and she said i have one more thing to say that i see here on facebook. 

Now before i say what she said on this call i want everyone to know what i think on news on facebook. i don’t believe it untill i do my own research into the topic. 

So continue to what she saw. She said that there was an article that the Democratic party wanted to kill everyone so they could take the trillions of dollars of minerals and keep the money. 

WHAT THE FUCK WAS SHE TALKING ABOUT!!!! 

I would like to see what article she was reading because she had to end that it was Donald Trump that (in my opion is the bisggest ass in the world and is steeling our money to vacation every weekend.) was the person that saved us from becoming exstinct in 2020. 

What that hell is wrong with teh 36% of america that is still supporting a man that is clearing sstupid and not doing anything for out country. 

More Blocks

I’m learning that my walls and safety zones are really hard to get out of. I’m still tryin to get past a lot of things that are making me scared to do. 

I’m trying to breath and try to push myself. 

I wish I could find that one thing that will help me. My therapist keeps telling me to just do it and get numb to doing this and then the emotion won’t be as hard. 

I do agree but that wall is higher then the great wall of china or the fabeled trump wall could possible be. 

Tax Day!!!

Well I know this is a bit off my ususal topic but has of tomorrow on april 15th for the protest for our elected President Donald Trump I will be going out and protesting for him to show his tax returns. 

I’m very scared and worried on what will happen. My anxiety is on the rise. I have never done anything like this before and feel like I will be confronted my so much negativity that I will want to just run home and hide more. 

I know I need to stand for my belief that our president is hiding things from us the people and since day one even before his first day as our president. (who made the worse speech in histroy) has done nothing but lie and show us how little he really knows about the world. 

I remember seeing a documenter about the one percent. About the riches people in the world and found how little they knew about the world. The creator was one of the children of Johnston and Johnston. Just the idea that they things they thought as normal and how they saw life was just money. They didn’t see people like we normal people do and in some cases that even a stretch. 

But i will make my sign i will go march and i will try to get over my anxiety and this one may help me conquor my social anxiety but also pressure the GOP and President Trump to finally release the truth in what are in his taxes. 

If he can take a 3 mill vacation every weekend with our tax money. then where is my vaction and why did i only get $13 back from teh state of arkansas and half of what i usually get in federal where is my money that will help me feed my family help me save so i could go on a nice vacation of my own. 

till next time. 

Changing!

When things change I will say this is the biggest thing that gets my anxiety up.

Why? You may ask because change is a good thing to grow. You are right but when things change and grow my sense of control is lost. I don’t know what will happen my control to know what will happen is gone. Then my internal feelings I become a very scared person and I want to run.

Well I am trying to conquer these feelings like in my first post I talk about “do it scared” I’m trying to change that a few things I’m doing now where I have some control but things I’ve never done because I was very scared.

These things and I hope to load pictures of my success is join a gym, meet new people with same interest. But also getting out of debt. 

I’ve become so comfortable being in debt but this is a big one to stop collection calls that starts some anxiety.

There will be more coming soon I’m sorry this post took so long I will post about my trip to Nevada to to the hand off with my son to stay with his father for a few months. 

Do it scared and make your life great. 

One Day!

Ever find yourself always saying “one day” “one day I will have my own place.” “one day i will be able to get that cute outfit” “one day I will work out.”

I’m stating to think “one day” is nothing but a bad word and a curse to say.

I keep thinking of things I want to do and keep thinking I will have time but when I think of it more i’m getting more anxiety because of it because all of a sudden i have failed myself.

So starting today i’m going to try not to say “one day” i’m going to say “Today I will” I hope I do well changing this part of my speech because I think it will help with how i am thinking.

I need to be more positive in my thinking to be able to get past anxiety and I will do it. little by little.

till next post love you all.

 

Do it SCARED!

Hi everyone my name is Rinny!

This is going to be an update on my life. I know boring.

But what may be interesting to know is i’m a 29 year old single mother still living at home with her mother. I also work full time but I live with a constant issue called Generalized Anxiety.

In none doctors terms it means that at any moment I can have a panic attack because something in my world was not right.

Now I’m proud to say I am no longer on any medication and I’m stable for the most part. I’m now trying to get my life back on track the way I have been wanting it to look like for years.

So this will be my journey (that i hope you will follow) to becoming the person I want to be.

Now my first thing is i’m really holding on to this saying my Therapist told me today and she said when your worried about doing something new “DO IT SCARED”. That is what she told me and i’m doing just that by one starting this blog and wanting to take my creativity to the next level and work on things i really really wanted to work on.

So first thing is my life is coming to kind of a zen time where for me being a single mother is hard and can stress anyone out. But i will be sending my 5 year old son to his fathers for a few month before he started kindergarten and starts his education for his life.

Now for these 4 months I will be stepping out in the world and trying things that scare me and writing about them. May even do a few videos as well.

The first thing on this list is actually the drop off of my son that will take place in Las Vegas NV. I have never been and I will be doing it on my own. So really excited but very scared. I just want things to go well and not have a panic attack as I make my way down the strip on my own without anyone with me.

So wish me luck till I post my next bit of information.